Hats

I buy a new SMU hat every year. I dunno why, I just do. Maybe it is a tradition or a right of passage. Maybe it is a fashion thing. Maybe it is the fact that after a year, my hats are good for nothing other than yard work.

So, Saturday’s errands took me near SMU and I stopped by the SMU Bookstore. I’ve done the khaki hat; I’ve done the white hat; mostly, I do the navy hat. Never did the red hat; never will do the red hat.

Usually, this is not a hard decision. After last year’s khaki hat, Navy was definitely in order for 2006-2007. One standard “Southern Methodist University” hat in Navy. This would be no. 5 of the same hat over eleven years. But they have some new hats. They have some new SMU football hats in Navy with a small, white embroidered football. My wife was partial to that one. They had a similar basketball hat as well. What better way to support the Doherty regime than with a new basketball hat? And then, I saw it…

Me: Look! An SMU BASEBALL hat.

Her: Huh?

Me: An SMU BASEBALL hat.

Her: Do we even have a baseball team?

Me: No.

Her: Then why is there a hat?

Me: Because it is cool. I’m getting it.

Her: But there is no SMU baseball team.

Me: No, but it is an ironic hat. And that makes it the best hat of all.

Her: That is stupid.

Oldest son: Don’t say, “Stupid.”

Me: That is right son, we don’t say, “Stupid.” Mommy is sorry. What better way to show unwavering support for all SMU sports than by sporting an SMU baseball hat, when there is no baseball team? That way, I am not picking favorites.

Youngest son: Thturped.

Her: I think he’s right. Make up your mind, we are going to La Madeline. I’ll get you a chicken caesar sandwich.

Me: Baseball. Basketball. Football. Baseball. Basketball. Football. Baseball. Basketball. Football. Baseball. Basketball. Football. Baseball. Basketball. Football.
Baseball. Basketball. Football.

Or, Baseball & Basketball & Football?